Saturday, March 22, 2008

An Easter Egg Story

This is not a story about Easter eggs. It is a story about eggs, and it occurred at Easter time.

Just so you know.

I don't usually buy my eggs in trays of 30, but it's true I didn't specify, when Dad asked what we needed from the store, that a dozen or so would suffice. I also didn't specify, because I like to live on the edge, that he might look for a tray in which Egg #27 hadn't been sitting there, broken an unrefrigerated, for 10 days.

Fortunately, I smelled Egg #27 even before opening the plastic seal - I'm lucky like that. So I took it outside to open it.

Dad watched through a window.

I brought in all the unsullied eggs and put them away. Then I went back for the sullied ones. A couple of them had become very attached to Egg #27, and had to be pried off of the cardboard carton.

I always thought eggshells were porous. Isn't some sort of oxygen exchange necessary for the (hypothetical) wee little developing chicks? And if so, wouldn't the rotten egg-ness osmose into the neighboring eggs? Well, I was assured that no such osmosis would occur; that the unbroken eggs wouldn't be any the worse for wear for spending 10 days next to--yea, bathed in--the slowly rotting guts of Egg #27, so I went ahead and washed them off.

I think, though, that the consuming of those particular eggs should be a voluntary affair, so I also took the liberty of marking them so we'll all know which are which at egg-selection time.

By the time I had the sullied eggs properly situated and went back outside with a plastic bag in which to seal Egg #27, its neighbor to the west (which was also cracked), and the rotten-egg-permeated cardboard, I made an intriguing discovery.

It seems that dogs like rotten eggs. They also like rotten-egg-permeated cardboard.

Note to self: No kissing the dogs.


ouyangdan March 22, 2008 5:54 PM  

ZOMG that was funny...

not for you i am sure...but i like the artwork!

i never buy eggs in the large cartons like that either, not even when living in a house w/ six people!

too many opportunities for breakage.

and, i am sure my OCD would preclude me from keeping any eggs that made contact, no matter how assured i was!


Dr. Psycho March 22, 2008 11:34 PM  

Well, now you can put out "pirate treasure" Easter eggs. The kids will love them.

Hey, kids have been known to identify boxes labelled with the skull and crossbones as "pirate food" (hence alternative labels like Mr. Yuk and Mr. No) -- especially in Pittsburgh.

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