Reflections on a bottled beverage

I almost never do this, but today I bought a bottled "flavored water" beverage to go with my lunch.

I'm not opposed to bottled beverages in principle, but it's hard to find a straight sugar-sweetened version anymore. They're all low-cal, and that means artificial sweeteners. I'm afraid of NutraSweet and suspicious of the other ones, so I usually just skip that whole class of beverages.

Anyway, I found myself in need of a lunch today and stopped at Bagelman's to get a chutney turkey peanut wrap...and a drink to go with it.

So I'm sitting here drinking this Grapefruit Bliss stuff, and reading the bottle.

The self-congratulatory verbiage on the back starts out 0 Calories - Yes, yes. I know. I bought it anyway. Then they claim Thousands of Smiles which, now that I translate it I realize must have been written in English originally, since it sounds a lot better that way. Anyway. The third little raindrop delivers the best news of all: Good source of ...wait for it... hydration.

Wow! This stuff delivers hydration! Unlike, you know, every single other beverage in the world.

**Eyeroll**