Day in the Life. "Now 95% Humor-Free!!"

Friday, October 6

5:30 - Wake up, sort of.
5:45 - Alex gets up, girls come into my bed.
6:00 - Get up, send girls for slippers, make bed.
6:05 - Round up girls, take their hands, go downstairs, let go of hands.
6:10 - Uncover parrot cage, open downstairs curtains. Start Alex's coffee.
6:15 - Get out girls' plates, loaf of bread, various spreads. Alex indicates oatmeal he has gotten out of fridge for their breakfast. That won't be enough for both of them, so leave the bread fixings out. Mention to Alex that the Sponge Bob melamine plates are not microwave safe.
6:20 - Fix usual granola with raisins & bananas, start my coffee.
6:25 - Steam milk & finish preparing my coffee, call girls to breakfast.
6:30 - Eat, remind girls to eat.
6:35 - ", " " " ".
6:40 - ", " " " ".
6:45 - Finish eating, remind girls to eat.
6:50 - Girls are done with their small portions of oatmeal, don't want more food. (Really?) Send them upstairs to get dressed, etc.
7:00 - Get dressed, brush teeth. Alex follows up with girls' morning rituals.
7:15 - Remind Alex he wanted to hang clothes outside rather than use dryer. Discuss location of clothespins and condition in which they are likely to be found. (I don't do clotheslines. I'm sorry, I just don't.)
7:20 - Wash breakfast dishes. Alex finds clothespins.
7:25 - Pack Robin's lunch - a banana and last night's pizza. Julia doesn't need a lunch and neither of them needs a snack because they have shared snack and Julia comes home early on Fridays.
7:30 - Make sure Julia has the mutant siamese twin banana that she wants to take in to show her friends. Make sure she has the article her teacher asked me to look up on the Internet yesterday. Get kids into car.
7:40 - Head down to school. Alex opens & closes gate (we no longer tie up the dogs).
7:50 - Drop girls at school.
7:55 - Arrive at gym, sit on steps to wait for class to begin.
8:00 - Dance class.
9:00 - Spinning.
10:20 - Arrive home. Leave car outside gate because someone will have to go pick up Julia in an hour.
10:30 - Greet Alex, help him clean spiderwebs off the living room ceiling by steadying a tall stool while he steps up and weilds a startlingly long-handled broom with an added extension. He cleans all visible spiderwebs, but was unable to dislodge the booger. He did shred it a little though. Find delicate way to show Alex how to hang a T-shirts on the line so they don't end up with two big clothespin-shaped stretch marks at the hem.
10:45 - Shower, change.
10:55 - Ask Alex what he thinks of going out with the girls and his parents this evening. Or maybe leaving the girls with his parents and going out together. He likes Scenario B.
11:00 - Check E-mail. (Highlight = Halloween picture of someone's rear end painted to look like a jack o'lantern, sent by one of Alex's clients.)
11:05 - Read a couple of blogs.
11:15 - Drive down to pick up Julia while Alex heats up some rice and beans for his lunch.
11:45 - Arrive home, reheat last night's pizza for Julia & me.
12:15 - Agree to let Julia watch the rest of her Dora the Explorer video. Consider updating guild treasury information. Read a blog instead, begin writing a comment with some suggestions regarding piñatas at childrens' birthday parties.
12:30 - Alex asks for help sending some information to English-speaking clients. Find out what he needs, then finish reading/writing comment.
12:45 - Write E-mail to Alex's client. (Higlight = Getting to say "sorry for the delay in getting back to you, but did you really have to moon us?")
1:00 - These clients also sent a document that needs to be translated, at least roughly, into Spanish. Alex needs to take it to the lawyer this afternoon and could I please translate it?
1:10 - Begin translating condominium bylaws into Spanish. Mutter about hideous formatting of source document.
2:10 - Have Alex review the document. He needs it E-mailed and also printed to take with him to the meeting with the lawyer. He's going to the lawyer's office after picking up Robin and wants me to go along so we can get the sheer fabric we need for curtains in the girls' room.
2:20 - Suggest that we get the fabric tomorrow so I don't have to go along to the meeting with the lawyer. Alex says okay, but would obviously rather I go.
2:25 - Print Alex's document. E-mail it to the lawyer. When the E-mail bounces back, go downstairs for Alex's jump drive and put a copy on that instead. Decide there's no reason not to go along for the ride. Shut down computer.
2:35 - Explain to Julia that we need to turn off the video (which is malfunctioning anyway) so we can go get Robin. Add that she and Robin will be spending the night at the grandparents' house tonight. Neither of these messages is well received.
2:40 - Try to comfort Julia for a second, then grab some clean clothes for the girls to wear tomorrow.
2:45 - Try to comfort Julia for another second, grab some cash for the curtain fabric.
2:47 - Tell Alex I've decided to come with him, get everyone into the car. Offer to sit in back with Julia to help her feel better.
2:50 - Head down to get Robin.
3:00 - Arrive at school. Climb into front seat while Alex goes in for Robin. It begins to rain.
3:05 - Alex comes out with Robin. Push car door open so she can dash in. Head down to Yolanda's. Robin demonstrates clapping/rhyming game she learned from a friend today. It is quite lengthy and, in the last line, somewhat risqué. Robin admits not understanding what the last line refers to. Admit that I'm not entirely sure myself (although let's just say I could take an educated guess.) Robin comes up with alternate ending. Agree that her way is better.
3:15 - Drop girls at Yolanda's. Robin shows José the new rhyme with brand-new ending. Julia must be coaxed from car. Rain picks up.
3:20 - Cell phone rings as Alex is starting car. He answers but it's for me so he starts driving while I talk. Long conversation about a complex situation prevents me from suggesting that Alex drop me at the fabric store while he goes to the lawyer's office.
3:35 - Hang up phone, catch Alex up on news.
3:40 - Arrive at lawyer's office. Pass Alex printed document and jump drive. He asks if I brought the lawyer's business card, which had the bad E-mail address written on it. Reach into his shirt pocket and pass him the business card. He leaves keys in ignition so I can listen to Jimmy Buffet tape while he meets "briefly" with the lawyer.
3:45 - Read every entry in his new address book, noticing where he has double-listed some people so he doesn't have to remember which name they're alphabetized under. For example, our neighbor is listed under both "E" for Esteban and "V" for vecino (which means neighbor).
4:00 - Put address book back on dash. Look out window. Think about things.
4:05 - Meeting is over. Discuss next move. Alex wants to get some coffee, but agrees that it might be a good idea to go to the fabric store first, in case it closes at 5:00.
4:10 - "Coffee" has been upgraded to "dinner" even though we're going "out" later tonight. Discuss possible places for dinner. Alex wants to invite a friend along when we go out later, so I call her but there's no answer.
4:25 - Alex parks outside fabric store, will wait in the car while I buy the sheers because it's a no parking zone.
4:30 - Find fabric, ask for 3 meters, take it to register, pay, return to car.
4:40 - Mention to Alex that there was some fabric that could work for curtains in the rooms where we still have provisional window treatments. Alex decides to leave the car to its fate and come inside to see the fabric. (Parking tickets, should we get one, are $5.)
4:45 - Show Alex the fabric. He likes the lime green for the curtains in his office. Indicate which 7 of the 10 available colors I think would work with our dijon-colored walls (Yes, really. Butterscotch yellow exterior, dijon yellow interior. I wasn't here at the time.) The fabrics I point out do not include the lime green, so he switches to dark blue (which almost didn't make the list either, but hey, it's his office).
4:50 - Alex suggests I choose some more fabric for decent curtains in the girls' playroom, which is also a guest room when needed. I choose the cream colored fabric, which he questions. I offer to choose something else, but he insists that it's my choice. But am I sure I want that particular one? I'm sure.
4:55 - Alex heads across the street to ask about an office chair while I pay for the fabric.
4:56 - Run across the street to get more cash from him.
4:57 - Still not enough. Check pockets, find a few more bills, which make enough. Pay for fabric.
5:05 - Alex suggests getting a pizza and going home to watch a video instead of going out to dinner. I am easily convinced and give him a rundown of the pizza places between here and home. We pick one we've heard good things about but haven't tried. Our friend calls back, having noticed the missed call on her cell phone, and agrees to join us for a drink later in the evening.
5:15 - At the pizza place Alex looks ready to wait in the car but I suggest he come in, which he does.
5:20 - Order pizza to go and a coffee for Alex while we wait. Sit down to wait. Exchange looks about the mural painted on the wall, which depicts a lovely pastoral scene in the background and, in the foreground, a pig on a spit over some coals. Something about the entry and exit points of the spit...anyway. One of the ladies working at the pizza place turns on the television for our benefit.
5:25 - Discuss violence in entertainment and why people would want to expose themselves to programming such as the sensationalist "news" program now playing. Discuss how few parents, even among relatively like-minded people, seem to be as sensitive to violence in childrens' programming as I am.
5:40 - Pay for pizza, drive home.
5:55 - Feed pets, get plates & napkins, take pizza upstairs, put on video (Ice Age 2)
6:00 - Like almost all rented videos in Costa Rica, this one's a bootleg (lots more about that here). Unfortunately, this particular copy doesn't offer the original audio track, only the Spanish and Portuguese translations. Sigh. Pick Spanish, serve pizza, start movie.
7:30 - Finish movie (almost as good as Ice Age 1, but lost a couple of points for the over-the-top elements, particularly when the vultures broke out in song.)
7:35 - I can't believe we're not even going to pick up our friend for another hour or more. I'm soooo sleepy. Fall asleep.
8:15 - Alex gets up. I sit up.
8:25 - Suggest that Alex go get our friend while I finish waking up. He leaves.
8:30 - Get up, change clothes, brush hair. Make quick cup of coffee.
8:45 - Walk over to neighbors' house with misdelivered mail. Neighbors not home. Go back home and wait outside gate for Alex, who arrives shortly. Get in car, drive down to restaurant.
8:55 - Choose table, order two beers and a ginger ale. Recommend the fish for our friend (who didn't just eat half a pizza).
9:00 - Musician takes the stage. Turns out to be the same one who was playing last time we were here. Try to enjoy his singing but find big-screen TV playing According to Jim in my peripheral vision very distracting, especially since, with Spanish subtitles, it doesn't matter that the volume is off.
9:15 - Musician is great, nice conversation at the table. Jim and Andy appear to be stalking Erik Estrada on a riverboat. Hilarity ensues.
9:30 - Sitcom ends. Continual commercials seem to indicate that Latin American Idol will be up next. This is good, because it will be much easier to ignore.
9:32 - Everybody Loves Raymond. Damn.
9:45 - Singer takes a break, comes around to the tables. Alex buys two copies of his CD for $4 each. Comment on technology that enables artists to distribute their work at such a reasonable price even on a very small scale. Raymond tries to help Robert hide the fact that he was victimized by a scam artist who posed as an agent looking for tall models. Hilarity ensues.
10:00 - Sitcom ends. Enjoy music, order another beer.
10:02 - King of Queens. Great.
10:15 - My newly unattached friend thinks the singer is good looking. Point out that his phone number and E-mail address are printed on the CD. Doug and Carrie's friends consider buying the house next to theirs, but decide not to. Some hilarity ensues, but not really as much as you'd think.
10:30 - Sitcom ends.
10:32 - Some random show comes on that I've never seen before. Woohoo! Except that the coffee has worn off by now and the singer is into some music that I'm not familiar with. Notice that the booth could use a thicker cushion.
10:45 - Get check, settle misunderstanding between waitress and my friend, who asked for separate checks.
11:00 - Singer takes a second break, we go home.
11:15 - Drop friend off at her house, head home.
11:30 - Bed.

As always, thanks to Sheryl at Paper Napkin for inventing this exercise in minutiae.